I plan to forget the past. That's my latest plan. Like any other plan, it won't actually work in a matter of days.
My first plan to recover from my ED was December 2002, I think. And I finally am confident to say that I "recovered" in October 2004.
It takes such a long time to see the fruits of my labour, but this time, I really gotta do what I gotta do.
Rented movies again... quite fun to just spend time alone. I don't care if I am anti-social, I know I'm just trying to focus on my life a little bit more and work on my esteem and trying to forget the bad things I've done in the past.
Going out with my friends sure can take my mind off them, but it's not.. natural. It's like trying to deny everything that happened by distraction.
I wanna get in touch with myself and go through the things I have said or done towards some people who affect me more than anyone else.
I feel okay... I just feel a little taken over. Sometimes I just feel like crying, so I do. Sometimes I feel like laughing, so I do.
I'm allowing myself to do whatever I want. Um, one of my guy friends said to me, "Fuck the world, just do whatever you want. Be selfish!" He was so sweet, I hugged him.
11:07 p.m. - 2004-11-16
Recent entries:
kristian - 2008-09-04
For those who are concerned. - 2006-12-14
mindless self indulgent rant - 2006-03-12
i could feel my bones. - 2006-02-28
2006 woot. - 2006-02-24
My profile
Archives
Notes
Diaryland
Random
RSS
others:
gavin-joel
anorexicpoet
wolfstone
bender87
squishyvan
someday-
nateboxley
randomsnark
patient-
prettysprite
zigglett
brokenwords
hilaryjordan
morning-view
andlikedude
ladyofthefae
shaggybill
unclebob
oceans-depth
silverbiker
j-pizz
dani-lou
chicagojo
brian-writer
elixia
gingeryette
radiogurl
torato
beety-queen
sir-liver
bleedinbitch
karabats
jesbohn
wildcrazy13
rosytears
soft-parades
infinidox
braw
lightfallsup
therules
what-if-
mixtape-
aquietboy
girldivided
ablossomfell
chsturtle
that
tealeaves
science-girl
ditchwater
firewaterice
clarity25
soul-glimpse
endiary
p-o-y
idealistic
stillbeating
theghostgirl
almostalone
her-story
marn
lovemetwice
inaptbeauty
softplaces
love-metal
dark-doll
lovelybones
bloodstream
kex
alwaysinhim
jackthripper