freakymandy's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- tongue-tied I ate quite a lot today and I feel utterly shameful and sinful. I better write them down to see if I really have gone too far. I'm just so glad I did not purge anything out, though the temptation was there...and high. Breakfast: 3 slices wholemeal bread, 1 glass of milk, some nuts (total: 400) Meh. 1400 cals! Am I trying to scare myself? It's depressing. I have eaten mostly healthy things...with lots of fibre and I can't figure out why my bowel movements aren't doing fine! I have taken 2 tablets of laxatives..and I know it's gonna screw up my body so much, I can't have a proper breakfast without rushing to the toilet AGAIN. So tomorrow, no breakfast for me. It's always this way, or my stomach will really feel so painful. I don't know why I just can't be regular!! I take in tons of fiber and nothing can get me moving. I hate to use the laxatives, but it's been FOUR fucking days. And I'm feeling so fucking bloated and fat now, cuz all the shits are stuck inside. Damnit. Tomorrow I'm buying bran cereal...I'm upset. I thought I could be normal. 7:40 p.m. - 2004-10-03 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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